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[personal profile] lanerose
Title: Break It
Fandom: Grey's Anatomy
Characters: Cristina, Mark
Rating: PG for swearing
Warning: SPOILERS to last night's episode.
Summary: Mark wants to sit next to Cristina at Joe's and talk about Meredith and Derek being all lovey-dovey. Not that that isn't completely improbable, but work with me. Cristina is less than amenable to this discussion.



Break It


"This seat taken?"

Cristina didn't even bother to look up from her most recent shot of tequila before she answered. "Yes."

"C'mon," Mark said cajolingly. "These seats have the best view of Meredith and Derek together. Now that the whole drama's done, it's kinda hot to watch them together. He's so good for her."

"Please," Cristina said as she looked up at him. She glared as he settled himself easily onto the stool beside him. "Just because you're the founder of McAss's fan club doesn't mean that I have to sit here and smile about him with you."

"McAss?" He raised an eyebrow, a grin crossing his face. "You do realize that not only is he technically your boss, he's also dating your best friend. Might be a good idea to find something nicer to call him than McAss."

"Now see, here's the thing." She shook her head. "He lost the right to play the 'I'm-your-boss' card when he started dating my friend. And since technically they slept together the night before we started, he's never technically been my boss."

Mark laughed.

"All right, I think I see your point." He leaned forward, resting his elbows and the bottom of his beer on the bar as he commented quietly, "But what about the boyfriend thing? Sure, that's gotta win him some brownie points."

"Points? Seriously? You seriously think that the boyfriend thing gets him points?" Cristina's eyebrows inched closer to the ceiling. "Seriously?"

"Well, why not?" Mark asked, shrugging his shoulders. "I mean, Derek gave me a black eye just for flirting with her. When they were broken up – before break-up sex became we're-broken-up-we-swear sex or we're-back-together sex, I mean – I told Derek he was lucky to be rid of her."

Cristina looked at him like he sucked more than a cheap whore in Manhatten, and he quickly waved his hands and shook his head. "It's what you're supposed to say, when a girl breaks up with your friend. Anyway, he spent the next five minutes yelling at me about how I didn't understand, and Meredith Grey was not only completely not responsible for how screwed up their relationship was, but also way out of my league."

"And I'll be that not once in his whole speech did he mention that he's the big reason Mer's got as many issues as she does," Cristina said.

"Derek's fault?" He blinked once, twice. "You seriously think this whole thing is Derek's fault? Seriously?"

"Shut up, blondie. You didn't know Mer before she met him."

"Come on." Mark took a sip of his beer and shook his head at her. He spread his hands why, beer bottle still entwined with the fingers of his right hand. "I seriously doubt that Meredith Grey was all bright and shiny before Derek walked into her life. She's always had the daddy issues and the mom issues and the –"

"I'm not saying she was Mary Poppins or any crap like that." Cristina interrupted. Mark drew in on himself, and waited. Cristina sighed. "I mean, sure she was dark and twisty. She wouldn't be Meredith if she wasn't dark and twisty. But it was like a happy kind of dark and twisty that didn't involve letting herself drown just because some asshole patient shoved her into the sound."

"Are you seriously telling me that Grey was perfectly ha-"

"She didn't want him at first." Mark stopped. She took a breath, and turned to look at him again. "Derek dragged her kicking and screaming into having a relationship with him, and made her the happiest I have ever seen her be right up until the part where his wife showed up and told Meredith that her stupid McBoyfriend was McMarried. Then McAss strings her along for six months on the vague hope that he might get divorced sooner or later maybe and calls her a whore when she has the nerve to find a new boyfriend. You seriously think he's getting into my good books any time this century?"

"Good books?" Mark's eyebrow twitched.

"All right, not that I keep them, but you get the point." Cristina took the rest of her shot and looked down at the bar. "He is so not good enough for her it's ridiculous."

"You talk about him like he's Satan."

"No, that's the She-Shepherd. Or it was." Cristina paused. She furrowed her brow for a moment, and shrugged. "I guess the title's vacant since she became a human being and then skipped town. Maybe you're not useless after all."

"Thanks. I think." Mark tilted his head sideways at Cristina. "Seriously though, he's a great guy, and I bet she's better for having met him."

"People only say something's good for them when it sucks, so thanks for agreeing that he sucks."

Mark's eyes widened as he looked at her. He turned away from her, then looked back. "If you really think so badly of him, why don't you say any of this to her, then?"

"Please." Cristina looked at him like he was exceptionally stupid. Which, since he still had no idea what she was talking about, maybe he was. After a moment, she continued, "She's my person. He makes her happy. You don't tell your person why their significant other is a complete piece of shit when your person is walking on clouds because he's so McDreamy."

"So you're just going to let them keep not-dating, even though you're sure it's a terrible idea for them to be together at all?" He looked at her – well, not like she had three heads, because that would've been freaking awesome to operate on, but in the way that a normal person would look at a three-headed something.

"I figure it's like that whole you break it you bought it crap, or whatever." Cristina shrugged, waving her shot glass vaguely in the happy couple's direction. "I hate the two of them being together, but she doesn't want anyone else, so he better stick around this time and make her really happy. He also needs to stop making out with nurses."

"What?" Mark asked, looking over at the smiling Derek.

"Oh, come on!" Cristina snorted. "Don't be an idiot. The whole hospital knew ten minutes after they walked out of the scrub room. He's a McAss who's lucky her friends also found out that he broke off the date he had scheduled and decided her happiness was worth more to them than finally getting him out of the picture for good."

"All right. So let's pretend just for a minute that I agree with you. Why can't I sit next to you at a bar?" Mark watched as Cristina rolled her eyes at him.

"Because you're his person. And his person and her person can't sit next to each other at bar. It's just wrong." Cristina shooed him away with her hands, the empty shot glass still in her hand. "So you get to leave me alone now."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously." She slammed her shot glass down on the counter and waved at Joe, shouting, "I need another shot and some better company."

Mark left before she had the chance to ignore him.

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